Cinnamon, Queen of the Interwebz

morninggloria:

But I remind people of wayward, flawed, or obnoxious brunettes.  Someone once told them that I remind them of Lindsay Lohan.  A coworker told me that I remind him of Marissa Tomei’s character from The Wrestler (must be all that freelance stripping I’ve been doing at work).  I remind someone else of Anne Hathaway… from Rachel Getting Married.  Someone else thinks that I’m a dead ringer for Marilyn Manson-era Rose McGowan.  Another person saw images of Ellen Page’s pregnant “Juno.”  Goggles thinks I’m like Liz Lemon.  A high school aquaintence told me I’m a dead ringer for Glee’s Rachel Berry, but with a smaller nose.

Shut up, everyone.

 I’ve been told I look like Brooke Shields, I don’t see it. We’re both tall and have brown hair, thats it. I’ve also been compaired to the tall chick on Saved by the Bell, Jessie? I didn’t watch that show. Again I think it’s just the tall thing

morninggloria:

Someone to enter rooms before me, bouncing around and motioning for everyone to get on their feet.  “YO YO YO!  STAND UP!  GET UP ON YOUR FEET!  ANNOUNCING!  THE WORLD CHAMPION!  THE ILLEST!”  And then I’d come onstage wearing, I don’t know, boxers’ robes with the hood up and “THE BADDEST” bedazzled on the back, and there would be dramatic explosions and a really loud sound followed by silence.  And then the crowd would cheer and then the beat would drop and then I’d start rapping and everyone would go bananas.

Step one:  Learn to not suck at rapping.  Step two:  Make at least one friend.

 I would totally make you the robes, they would be very shiny

morninggloria:

greengrey:

morninggloria:

… and the next thing you’re going to do is tell me about how fucking warm it is in Florida.  Oh, isn’t that a delightful thing, to be able to call someone in Chicago who is not your friend who is working while you are splayed like a beached octopus beside the pool in fucking Boca Raton.  Do you know that mean’s “Rat’s Mouth”?  Well, it does.  I wish you’d catch the bubonic plague.

“It’s great here!” I say, “PERFECT temperature.  Best city in the WORLD.”

I wouldn’t get to upset. If you live in Florida the ONLY thing you can brag about is the weather. Let them have their fun!

This happens almost every day.  Sometimes multiple times a day.  Same person.  He just likes calling me and bragging. 

My fist yearns to get to know his face on an intimate and high velocity basis.

 personally I’d watch for a hurricane or something in Florida and call him

so the man applied for a full time job a his place of part-time employment (where it’s notoriously hard to get a full time position)

he found out today that he did not get the job

I’m off to take him out for dinner to cheer his broke ass up

morninggloria:

My elementary school would always pay someone to prepare and maintain an ice rink during the winter.  Before recess, we’d all sit on the floor on the hallways leading outside lacing up our skates and chattering and wrapping ourselves in scarves and putting on those mittens on strings.  We’d have races, we’d learn spins, and the bad kids would clothesline the nerds.  Winter recess ice skating was awesome.

One year, we had an unseasonably warm day in the beginning of February and the ice rink melted.  Everything melted.  The next day, it got freakishly cold again and everything froze over, but since everything had been liquid the day before, when it refroze, all of the playground was coated with a thick coat of perfectly smooth ice.

I don’t think I’d lived until I’d experienced the weird pleasure of wearing ice skates on the monkey bars, or skating as fast as I could from one end of the playground to the other and then dropping to my knees and sliding 20 feet on my snowpants.  I think we had a couple of ice playground handstand contests, too, which was probably pretty dangerous.

Best winter ever.

 you got to skate at recess?!?!!? cool!

bluebears:

lenorebeadsman:

A week from tonight morninggloria and I are planning a romantic date to a school function so we can score some free food and drinks. All good so far. BUT WAIT! I just got an email. This party has a theme. It’s a MAsquerade ball. Get it? Because we’re MAster’s students getting our M.A.s. We are encouraged to come in costume.

Body of Christ.

I demand pictures of said event.

 I second the motion

I love tea, but I wants my coffee in the morning, at least one cup. Alas since the demise of the coffee straw yesterday I will not have any until late next week at the earliest. Damn you shipping time!!

Sweet Coconut Chai Tea is super yummy, but it is not Double Chocolate Brownie Coffee.

sad panda

greengrey:

They say it’s “dangerous” because you wouldn’t be able to get away in a bad situation.

First of all, where the FUCK do they live that they need to drop shit and run at a moments notice?

Secondly, I guess I should get all judgey about people who are bad runners/slow runners because OMG THAT’S SOOOOO DANGEROUS.

And finally, I can run in heels. Just because they suck doesn’t mean I do too.

 I love you forever for this, I run in heels. They have good traction, espically the spikey ones, dig that heel in. Also I’d hate to be kicked by a woman in heels, my heels are extra weapons bishes!!

morninggloria:

My parents would never let me go on field trips to Wild Mountain or Trollhaugen, the only nearby ski hills.  They’d disdainfully sneer that skiing is for “prep school types,” which is funny, because I don’t think that either of them really knew any “prep school types.”  My dad grew up in Frederic and my mom 45 minutes away, in Shell Lake.  They both went to University of Wisconsin branch campuses and they’ve lived in Frederic since they’ve been married.

They also never let us golf, play tennis, or sail, even if our friends invited us.  Because “rich people” do that stuff.

Disliking this vague stereotypical conception of what “rich people” are (based on, I assume, Uncle Pennybags from Monopoly) is the Official Sport of my family.

 LOL my fam is not “prep school types” I went skiing at those places, with my mom’s ski’s from the 70’s, because it was to expensive to rent them. Also I took tennis lessons through Parks & Rec with my mom’s 70’s tennis racket. Hand-me-down-high-class FTW!

(also that tennis racket rocks, it looks like a badminton racket only it’s bigger and chrome)

I just ordered a new one, $15 flippin dollars and it won’t even be here for 4 to 10 business days. I’m Sad Panda right now, but I have a feeling I’ll be moving on to Crabby Bunny if I can’t have coffee at work until late next week … beware